A Tale Of Fake Priests
by Ally-617-luv-tv
Summary: The wedding in Paris was never legal... JavaJunkie.
1. Of Creepy Salespeople

**A/N- Alright, if you've ever read any of my other work, then you'll know that I have a horrible habit of not continuing stories. But I swear, this one I will. At least, if I get reviews. So please review! I love reviews!**

**Disclaimer- I don't own anything you recognize.**

Lorelai groaned as she looked for the Bangles CD in Target. "Why, why, why, why! How could I have managed to lose this! I liked my first copy, even if I didn't listen to it very much!"

She noticed the salesperson staring at her in a kind of awkward way. "Sorry… I know it _looks _like I'm talking to myself, but really, I'm not, I'm just scolding my- you know what, never mind."

With the salesperson still staring at her, Lorelai searched. "Look, lady, I don't need any help." The salesperson still stared. Lorelai glanced at her suspiciously and kept looking. She sighed in relief when she finally found the new CD. She grabbed it and left to go to the checkout, still giving backward glances to the saleswoman.

After she got into her house, she considered listening to it. "Why bother, the only reason I bought this is because I lost the first copy I had… wait… that was the second copy… where do these things go!" All of a sudden she felt Chris's arms around her. For a split second, she had a fleeting thought that Luke was here, that Luke was back and Chris was with Gigi in parts unknown.

"Talking to yourself again?" Chris asked as he kissed her on the lips.

"You see, you're just like that saleswoman." Lorelai responded.

"What?"

For a moment, she considered explaining and telling the story of the creepy woman. It would be just like her, but somehow, she didn't feel like having Chris respond in his usual way. She wanted Luke, she wanted it to be Luke that held her, she wanted it to be him to laugh at her story and hold her hand and watch movies with her while lecturing her on her junk food intake, instead of Chris being Chris and not caring. She wanted Luke to care.

"Don't ask."

Chris laughed as he moved on to her neck. "I won't."

"You know what?" Lorelai moved away. "I'm tired, I think I'm gonna head up to bed."

Chris looked at her, confused. "Okay, then."

She made a move to go to the stairs, but stopped herself and turned around. "I'm sorry Chris, I really am."

"What are you apologizing for? You had a tough day, with all the inn stuff, I understand."

"Okay." She hadn't been apologizing about that at all.

As she climbed under the covers, she realized that she wasn't really tired at all. She picked up the phone to call Rory, but somehow the number she dialed came out to be Luke's. She listened to it ring on the other end, and was surprised for some reason when he picked up with a gruff "Hello?"

"Hey, Luke…"

"Hey, Lorelai, what's wrong? Is everything okay?"

Luke sat up in bed, immediately worried.

"Yeah yeah yeah, everything's fine."

"Okay…" Luke was confused, just as confused as Lorelai was.

"I just called to um, ask you a question."

"Okay…" There was an awkward pause. "Aren't you going to ask it?"

Lorelai panicked at this, she hadn't actually prepared a question. "Right, yeah, uhh… well, I was just wondering if the uh, diner was open tomorrow."

"Yeah, it usually is."

"Right, yeah, sorry, just, you know, making sure."

Lorelai cursed herself inwardly.

"Okay then."

"Okay."

"Anything else?"

"Nope, that was all."

"Alright. Bye, Lorelai."

"Bye Luke."

Lorelai tossed the phone into the pile of dirty laundry that sat beside her dresser. "Stupid, Lorelai, stupid. Ugh!" She mumbled angrily at herself for a few more moments before shutting off her light and turning over to go to sleep. But as she tried to enter dreamland, she couldn't help wondering if there was a reason for calling Luke, not Rory. "I just thought Rory would be asleep, that's all, and I dialed the next familiar number as an instinct."

She knew as well as the next person that this was bullshit, but for tonight, she just had to believe it. She closed her eyes and finally fell asleep to the sound of the baseball game on the TV downstairs.

But it seemed that in a few short moments, an alarm was going off and Chris was snuggling up to her. "Wake up, Lor."

"Five more minutes… just five…"

"I'll be making breakfast."

All thoughts of Luke forgotten, she smiled and mumbled, "You're a god."

Chris chuckled. "I know I am."

Lorelai rolled over to the warm spot Chris had left, but finally just groaned and got up. She went over to the dresser and picked out some clothes for the day, and headed to the bathroom to take a shower.

Finally ready for the day, she relished the fact that it was her day off, and it wasn't Chris'. She grabbed her plate of eggs and bacon and quickly kissed Chris as he left. Taking a cup of coffee, she heard the phone ringing. Setting the cup down, she ran to get to the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey Mom!"

"My sweet Lory, how's the wife?"

"Not funny!"

"Oh, is this Rory? Pretend you never heard that!"

"Ha, ha."

"Whatcha calling me for, babe?"

"Can't a daughter call her mother for no reason at all?"

"Not at eight thirty, no."

"Oh, you've caught me."

Lorelai laughed.

"Are you doing anything for lunch today?"

"Chris is at work all day, and it's my day off. So yes."

"Ha, ha. Do you want to meet me somewhere?"

"Sure… how 'bout Luke's?"

"Are you sure Mom?"

"Yes, I called him last night to see if he was open in foresight of this conversation!"

"Mom, have you been watching reruns of Charmed? Do you think that you're physic again?"

"I still maintain that I knew that Grandma would make us come to Friday night dinner."

"Mom, if you'd asked Paul Anka he'd have told you the same."

"Fine."

"Alright, if you're sure, I'll meet you at Luke's at one."

"Alright babe."

"Kay. Bye Mom."

"Bye my Lory!"

Rory shook her head and flipped her phone closed. Seeing Paris, she ran ahead and caught up with her. "Hey Paris."

"Gilmore."

"What did I do this time?"

Paris laughed. "Nothing, I just like messing around with you. Don't I, Doyle?"

"Yes you do, Paris."

Paris looked at Rory. "See?"

"Okay, then, well, uh…"

"What do you want, Rory, I've got a tight schedule."

"I was just saying hi. Hi."

"Hi." Paris waved mockingly. "Now, I have to get going. Go get some coffee or something, because there's something wrong with you today."

"Nice to talk with you too, Paris."

Doyle smiled at Rory. "See you later!"

"Bye, Doyle."

Rory went over to get some coffee, like Paris had suggested, and walked around campus for a while. Before she knew it, it was time to meet her mom. She grabbed her book bag and got into her car. As she arrived at Luke's, she checked the time and discovered that she had a half hour before her mom would show up. _I'll just get a cup of coffee._ She walked through the door, to be met with the smell of Luke's and the familiar sound of the bell ringing. She hadn't been here in so long…

Walking over to Luke, Rory grinned and waved at Lane, who was serving an elderly couple. Lane grinned and waved back. "Hey, Luke."

"Rory! What are you doing here? I've missed you and your intake of coffee!"

As he said this, he filled a cup with the famous liquid and handed it to her.

"Thanks… I'm actually meeting my mom."

"Really? So there was a reason she called me last night."

"Oh, she actually called you? Wow, I thought she was just making it up."

"Nope, she called me."

"Oh."

They stared at each other. Finally Rory broke the silence with, "I guess I'll… go and get a table."

"Okay, great."

"Okay."

She walked over to the table by the window and looked outside to the street, looking for her mom. Lane walked over and sat down. "Rory!"

"Lane, hey!"

"Whatcha doing?"

"Oh, I'm just, waiting for my mom… she's meeting me here."

As Rory spoke, Lorelai walked over to the table. "Lane! Rory!"

"Hi Mom!"

Lorelai hugged Rory.

"Hey Lorelai."

"Hi, Lane, how's it going? How're the twins?"

"Oh, they're good, they're great."

"Okay, so I've got possible name options."

"Tell, tell."

"Brad and Jennifer."

"No."

"Susanna and Michael."

"Somehow, I don't think my children would enjoy being named after The Bangles."

"Yes! Yes, they want to!"

Lane shook her head at Lorelai and went back to waiting. "Bye guys."

"Bye, Lane."

"Victoria and Michael?"

"No!"

"Hmph."

"Alright Mom, burgers?"

"Burgers all the way, babe."

Rory smiled.

"Must we wait?"

"Aren't I supposed to be the one whining?"

"Never. I had you young, I never got sufficient whining time."

"With Grandma and Grandpa, I bet you had your share of whining."

"I was a special needs child. The school counselor prescribed me all the whining I could possibly get."

"It didn't work."

"Hey!"

Rory stuck her tongue out at Lorelai as a response.

"I've taught you well, child, I've taught you well."

"I know, I know."

After a few more moments of waiting, Lorelai couldn't take it any longer. "Luuuuuuuuuuuke!!"

"I'll be there in a second."

"We want our usual!"

Luke went to argue for a moment, but finally gave up and just wrote burgers, extra fries, no vegetables on his pad.

Lorelai's cell phone suddenly rang. Luke pointed to the door before going back to taking orders.

"The diner-man has spoken!" cried Lorelai as she answered it and walked to the door.

"Hey Chris."

"Lor. You'll never believe what I just found out."

"Elvis has been spotted?"

"We're not married."

She gasped. "What?!"

**T.B.C. (for real)**


	2. Old Feeling

**A/N- Okay, so I swore I'd update. Here it is, folks, enjoy!! And thanks for all the reviews!**

**Disclaimer- If you recognize it, I don't own it, although chances are, I probably wish I do.**

"We're not married."

"How-how could we not be? I was there, I saw it, we got married."

"The guy, in Paris, he was a fake."

"Noo."

"Yes."

"Oh, my god."

"Yes."

"Umm, well, I guess we're back to being engaged."

"What?! Lor, come on. Let's get married again."

"No Chris, you come on. This is fate, this is saying that it wasn't meant to be right now."

"What are you talking about!?"

"Let's just… talk about it when we get home, okay?"

"Fine."

Lorelai hung up, in shock. But she was almost… relieved. They weren't married. She smiled. They. Weren't. Married. It was like a giant weight had been lifted off of her chest. She ran back inside.

"Mom, why so excited?"

"Your dad and I, we aren't married."

Rory stared.

"And you're excited about this?"

"Rory, fate is fate. I think that we were never meant to be."

"Does this mean you're getting back together with Luke?"

"What!? Rory, I thought you'd be more upset about this, I mean, this is your dad and I."

"Mom, I never really believed that you were meant to be together. I liked things the way they were, and frankly, I'm relieved that you guys aren't together."

"I liked things the way they were too."

They smiled at each other. Luke walked over with their plates.

"Here you guys go, good luck with your heart attacks."

"Thanks Luke!"

"Thank you, Duke."

"Oh, jeez!"

As they watched him walk away, Rory looked at her mom. "Why didn't you tell him?"

"I don't want to rush anything."

"So you still like him?"

Rory's voice was hopeful.

"Babe, I don't know. Maybe?" Lorelai began picking at her food. "I just… I don't want to mess anything up."

"But are you and Dad… over?"

"I really and truly don't know."

Later Rory found herself at Lucy and Olivia's apartment. She didn't know why she'd gone over there, maybe because of the shock of her parent's non-marriage. But she wanted to make things right with Lucy, she really did. So she knocked on the door.

Olivia answered. "What do you want?"

"Can I please- can I please just talk to Lucy?"

Olivia went to say no, but she saw the desperation on Rory's face. "Fine."

"Thank you."

Rory walked into the familiar apartment. She looked over at Olivia. "She's in her room. Go in."

She felt uncomfortable just barging, so she knocked first. Lucy's voice came through. "Come in."

She opened the door and walked inside. Lucy looked at her. "Hey, can we talk?"

"Fine. Talk."

"Look, I am _so_ sorry that you had to find out that I knew him like that. I never ever wanted to keep it a secret, I really never did. And when I saw him, I went to go say something, but you guys had left and he just pretended like he'd never even met me. I wanted to tell you so bad, but I was… I was so confused, and everything that was going on kept replaying in my head with Logan, and my mom, and my dad, and just everything, and before I knew it, I was in this big mess and I am _so _sorry for it."

Lucy just looked at her. Finally, she nodded. "I get it."

"Does that mean we're okay?"

"We're okay. I just wish you'd told me you knew ex-boyfriend."

"_Ex_-boyfriend?"

"Yeah, he um, he told me that he like someone else and broke up with me."

"Oh, Lucy, I'm sorry, really."

"It's okay, it's cool, I'm okay."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

All of a sudden, Rory started to feel overwhelmed. Everything that had been going on, all of the things were piling up on her.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine…"

"Are you sure, you don't look-"

Lucy was cut off by Olivia entering the room.

"Sooo," she said coldly. "How's it going in here?"

Lucy looked at her. "Me and Rory, we're okay."

Olivia smiled. "Good! I was getting bored without her!"

Lucy laughed. "Too be honest, I was too."

Rory smiled sort of absently. She was fighting back tears as it was, and she really didn't want them to see her cry again.

"Rory, are you sure you're okay?"

"My parents were never married."

Both looked at her in confusion.

"I guess I'd probably tell you my life story."

"Yeah, that might be good." Olivia was sarcastic.

"Do you guys wanna, uh, go to the couch?"

"Sure."

Once they were settled, Rory began to talk.

"My mom, Lorelai, had me when she was sixteen. Her parents, my grandparents, are rich. Filthy rich, and snobby too. They wanted to control her. They wanted to have her marry my father, Chris, and have Chris go into my grandpa's business. My mom, she refused. She didn't want to do marry him; she didn't want to have anything to do with my grandparents. So when I was one, my mom ran to Stars Hollow. She didn't have a job, or anything. She went to this inn, and begged the manager, Mia, for a job. She got a job as a maid, and she worked hard to move up. Mia, she gave us a home in the inn's old potting shed. That was my home until I was ten, then we moved to a real house. I was so disappointed, because I loved that shed." Rory smiled. "But I grew to love our new house too. Then my mom met Luke. He was her best friend for a long time, other than Sookie, the chef at the inn. But they… they loved each other. And a few of years ago, they got together. And then they got engaged. They were supposed to be married June third. But things happened, and Luke found out he had a daughter, and they just… ended. And my mom, she got together with my dad. It was a rebound, I think, they've been skating around each other for years now, but they were never meant to be. But they went to Paris, and they got married. Only they didn't really get married, I don't know the details. All I know is that the guy who married him, he was a fake. And I don't know what to think anymore, I was happy with Mom and Dad, and I was happy with Mom and Luke, and all of this stuff just keeps piling up, and it's confusing, and the stuff with you guys, and Logan, and it's just…"

She was really trying to fight back the tears now, she normally didn't cry that much, but with the combination of stress, PMS, and no sleep the tears just kept on coming, and before she knew it, she was full out sobbing. Olivia and Lucy both hugged her, and in that moment, she knew that she would eventually be okay.

Lorelai stared at the empty seat that Rory had left behind. Before, when Rory was sitting in front of her, it had seemed just like old times. It wasn't awkward, somehow. But now, it was just her. And things were getting more and more awkward by the second. Lane had left to be with her husband, and Rory had left to go back home, and it was just her, Luke, and Kirk. Kirk sat at a table, sipping his drink quietly, and so for all purposes, it was just her and Luke. The lunch crowd had no doubt, gone to tell everyone in the town that Lorelai was at Luke's and maybe they'd get back together and have the cutest little babies! _God, _thought Lorelai, _I just hope word doesn't get out quickly that Chris and I were never married. Patty and Babette would just eat it up._ But in this town, them not finding out was laughable.

Lorelai noticed that Kirk had gone, so she paid for the burger and went to go get her coat. But Luke, who was wiping down Kirk's table because he had spilled the last quarter of his drink, thrown a five down on the table and ran, noticed she was leaving. "Hey, who was on the phone? You looked pretty surprised when you came back in."

"Oh, it was- it was just Michel, yelling at me that I'd forgotten to do some paperwork. You know, that Michel, he's always surprising!" She laughed kind of awkwardly.

"Yeah, that Michel…" It was obvious to Luke that she wasn't telling the truth, but he didn't press it.

"I'd- better get going."

"Okay."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Lorelai walked out the door, the bell ringing on her head. She was walking, and kept walking. It seemed like all a dream, everything. She didn't know what to think anymore. She went over to the gazebo and sat down on the bench. Her and Luke… they'd kissed right here. They'd bought "chick beer" and toasted and… and kissed, right here. She wanted that. She didn't want Chris, she wanted Luke. The cold, hard truth. And she didn't care.

Lorelai smiled.

"I love Luke."

**A/N 2- The fight with Lorelai and Chris is in the next chapter. If you review I'll write quicker! I hope you guys liked it!**


	3. To Sleep On Couches

**A/N- FIGHT! FIGHT! Do tell me if I've written it well.**

**Disclaimer- I. Don't. Own. It. Blah. Blah. Blah. **

Lorelai walked in the door of her house. "Chris? Chris, I'm home."

Chris came walking down the stairs. "Hello, Lorelai."

"Okay, I get that you're mad."

"No, I'm not mad. I'm not mad at all."

"Chris…"

"No, Lorelai, no. I'm not doing this."

"Can we please just talk?"

"Fine. Talk."

"This whole thing… it was just so rushed, okay? I loved Luke. And when we broke up, it hurt Chris, it really did. So… I needed comfort. I needed someone that I could rebound on, because I've got the emotional baggage that even an industrial forklift couldn't hold. You- you were the first person that came to mind, okay? You're the father of my child, we just have so much history. And then, things started getting so serious. I thought I loved you Chris, I really did."

"And now?"

"I don't know anymore."

"Fine. I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight, don't wait up."

And with that Chris was gone. He went out the door without any thought. Lorelai sank to the ground and began to cry.

Rory walked in through the door of Paris and Doyle's apartment. She looked around miserably, just… needing her mom in that moment. She didn't want Logan, she didn't want Paris, she for some reason wanted to be seventeen again and still in the ritual of Chilton to home to Luke's to Jess to her mom. She wanted to be with her, she didn't want to worry about college graduation and money and living and Logan. She just wanted to go back to being a kid again. Was that too much to ask for? Just for one night? But she knew that her mom was busy with her dad, and she'd feel awkward breaking in on that. She took a deep breath and walked into her room. Grabbing her well read copy of Pride and Prejudice; she opened her dresser and took out a pair of pajamas. Quickly showering and getting dressed, she settled down in her bed and began to read. Before she knew it, she was sound asleep.

"_Rory, Rory, come play come play!" Lane's voice was yelling. "I can't Lane, I can't play. It's school! I have to go to school!"_

"_It's only the first day of first grade!"_

"_It's the first of all firsts, please be early with me?"_

"_Okay."_

_Sitting through the day… tic, toc, tic, toc. Clock is ticking, clock is ticking… learn, learn. Go home._

"_Mommy, mommy! You forgot to pick me up!"_

_The girl… the little girl… looks around… "Mommy?"_

_No mommy anywhere… where's the mommy…_

Rory woke up with a gasp. She was sweat covered and her blankets were in a ball on the floor. She turned over and tried desperately to go back to sleep. She couldn't, she couldn't sleep. She missed her mom. Why was that so hard to comprehend? It was the first day of college all over again. It was last year's fight all over again. She couldn't page her; she couldn't call her… why couldn't she? But she was all alone. _Get used to it, Gilmore, it's happening more and more._

Lorelai awoke and turned over, expecting to see Chris on the other side of the bed, or at least a warm spot. But no… all of last night came back at her. Was it a dream? She glanced at the clock. Twelve forty-five. Jesus, she'd slept late. Mumbling tiredly, she got out of bed and haphazardly threw on an outfit. At least it wasn't her rodeo outfit. She laughed under her breath, remember that day. If Lorelai had been cliché, she would have thought of how fast time flies by. But really, it did. Here was a woman getting closer and closer to forty by the day that still was getting her life on track. _Hell, I even have a kid. _She took a deep breath and picked up the phone. Dialing Chris' work number, she tried as hard as possible not to hyperventilate as she heard it ring. "Hello?"

"Hi, Chris…"

"Lor."

At least he wasn't as mad as last night.

"I have one question for you. How the hell did you find out?"

"Why now, Lorelai?"

"Chris, come one. I need to know."

"The guy gave me his and his lawyer's numbers. I called his lawyer with a question, and the guy who answered said he'd never heard of this guy. I called the guy up, and he answered the phone with, 'Whoever the hell is calling right now, hang the fuck up.' He isn't legal, is he."

"Chris."

"I don't want to talk to you anymore, Lorelai. Ever."

"What!? Chris, come on, you can't just do that!"

"Watch me. I can't be in this relationship right now, Lorelai. I can't."

"Can we at least… try?"

"I was never ready for this. I was… caught up in the moment. I never really believed this was all real, Lor."

Lorelai's voice was soft. "I never did either, Chris."

"So, this is another one of these non-lasting relationships, isn't it?"

"I think it is."

"I'll pick up my stuff Monday."

"Okay."

"Good-bye, Lorelai."

"Bye Chris."

She was suddenly free. She wasn't married, she wasn't in a relationship. She picked up the phone again and called Rory.

"Hello?"

"Hey babe."

"Mom."

"Your dad and I… we're over."

Rory was silent.

"Rory? Honey, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Are you though?"

"I don't know, Rory. Just… come over, babe. We can have a movie night. And- and you can sleep in your room."

"Are you sure that's what you want?"

"I'm sure. Now, let's see. What movies do we want? I was thinking along the lines of new, boring teenage dramas. The ones that you love to make fun of."

"We'll hit the movie store the second I get there... but I was thinking more of scary, with really bad effects."

"I'll see you soon."

"Okay. Bye Mom."

"Bye hon."

Later they sat finishing up on the original version of The Amityville horror, with the eighties version of The Exorcist beside them and disgusting junk covering the table.

"I'm so full, yet I can't stop eating!"

Rory put another marshmallow into her mouth.

"Ohh, try that, with chocolate."

"Ohh, yum!"

"Ohhhhhhhhhhh… don't mention chocolate…"

"You were the one that mentioned it?"

"Stop talking about it… ohhhhhhh…"

"Are you getting old? Is it possible that you're not able to take all the intake of food?"

"No! Shut up. I can eat just as much as before."

"I'm sure you can."

"Yes! I can! Did you see all those fries that I ate?"

"All three of them?"

"I am not getting old! Ohhhhhhh… I'd argue more but I'm too full…"

"Me too..."

They both sat there for a while, just relishing in each other's presence.

"We've really got to spend more time together, Mom."

"We do, babe, we do."

**A/N 2- Like it? Hate it? REVIEW:) **


	4. Bottles and Bottles

**A/N- This chapter contains some serious Chris ass kicking by yours truly. Be warned. **

Rory groaned as she got out of her bed. _Is it possible to get a hangover from junk food?_ She mumbled something about stupid loud noises and waking up, and walked into the kitchen to get some crappy coffee. _We have GOT to go to Luke's._

Lorelai rolled out of bed when she smelled the coffee from downstairs. As she went down the stairs, she added in a rhythmic "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ooooooooooowwwwwwwwww," for every stair she went down.

Pouring herself a cup of crap in the kitchen and drinking it all, burnt tongue put aside, she finally found the strength to utter the words that had been on her mind since she woke up. "Can you get a hangover from chocolate?"

Rory just groaned and put her head on the table in response.

"To Luke's?"

Rory groaned in response again.

"To Luke's."

_Make it not awkward, please…_

"Hey, Luke, we need coffee."

"Yes, Duke, give us coffee or give us death."

"First of all, why the hell are you up so early? Second of all, wait. Your. Turn."

"We have a junk hangover."

Lorelai just groaned.

Luke looked at her. "Getting old? And that stuff will kill you."

"I am NOT getting old! Owwwww… my head… my stomach…"

"Old." Rory mouthed to Luke. He laughed and went back to taking orders.

Finally at their table, with their cups of heaven, mother and daughter seemed much more amicable. Neither were up to talking, but they could at least open their eyes. Almost.

Luke walked over to them. "Ready to order?"

"Two hangover specials please."

Rory groaned again.

"No cheese?"

"Extra cheese."

"Coming right up."

Lane walked bouncily over too them. "Hey, guys!"

Lorelai groaned. "Could you keep your voice down?"

"Ooohh, hangovers?"

"Hangovers from junk."

"Impressive."

Rory was silent. "Hey, babe, you awake over there?"

"No."

"You get grumpy when you're sleep deprived and chocolate hung-over!" Lane said.

"How. The. Hell. Are. You. So. Perky?"

"The twins kept woke me up this morning with some good old morning sickness!"

"Ooh, I remember the sickness. Rory was a very sick baby."

"Was not."

"Was so."

Rory groaned again.

"HA! You were! You were just like this."

Lane laughed. "She didn't sleep very well, I take it?"

"According to her, I'm old. So I assume that I fell asleep with no problem, and she was up all night partying her ass off."

Rory looked up from the table. "I resent that."

"I'm sure you do."

She sighed. "Alright, I'm up, I'm up."

"Oh, my god! Flags should fly at half mast! The government, it should be closed!"

"Shut up."

Luke walked over with hot plates. "Food."

Rory was finally awake. "Ooooh, eggs, with… with… unidentifiable meat and unidentifiable green stuff!"

"Sausage and green peppers."

Lorelai looked at him like he was crazy. "Vegetables? Did you put vegetables on our junk hangover specials?!"

"With extra cheese… come on, just try them, they're fine."

"I would SO kick your ass with my arguing skills if I wasn't so damn hungry."

"Alright. I'll be serving other customers."

Rory began to eat. "Az ou sood be."

"What!?"

Lorelai was attacking her food. "Se said as ou sood be."

"You know what? I don't even want to know."

"Yef, that's rie, wal way."

Luke just shook his head.

Chris walked into the college campus, looking around for Rory. He had no clue where she could be, he didn't know where she lived… well… he knew, in the back of his mind… if he could just figure it out… all of a sudden, he bumped into a tall man. The man looked surprised, but quickly apologized with, "Oh, I'm sorry sir, I didn't see you there."

"It's all riiigh!" Chris slurred back.

"Sir, have you been drinking?"

"Noo, me, drink? I just broke off with my non-wife, and I'm drinking? Neeever."

"I'm a security guard here, and I'm going to have to ask you to leave the campus."

"Hey, no, buuddy, look! It's my daughter, Rory… she'll straighten everything out. Hey, Rory!"

Rory walked over to the man and the security guard. "What… Dad?!"

"You know him?"

Rory looked upset. "Yeah, I know him, he's my father. Dad, have you been drinking?"

"Of course not, Rory!" She could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"I'll take care of him, sir. I'm sorry about this."

"No problem, ma'am."

"Thanks."

Rory grabbed onto Chris's arm and pulled him angrily through the crowd to her car. Getting in it, she started it up and drove off in silence.

"Rory? Rory, come on, don't be like this!"

"I'm not talking to you when you're drunk, Dad."

"Come on, Rory."

"No, Dad, no."

She brought him to his apartment and went inside with him, picking up the empty bottles as she stepped.

"Rory, Rory look. Your mom and I, we have, we have creative differences. If just won't ever work." He smiled bitterly.

"Dad."

"So I'll say this. Rory, choose. Your mom or I."

"Wha- what do you mean?"

"If you choose to leave now, you're saying that you love your mom more. If you stay, you love me."

"Dad, you're drunk, you're not thinking rationally."

Chris cut her off. "No Rory, no. This is me speaking. I know you'll choose your mom. I get it. But this, this is me. And I love you Rory, but I don't think we should talk as much anymore. I'm going to- I'm moving, Rory. I'm going to be… in a place near Gigi and Sherry. I don't think you'll want to talk to me that much. But I'll give you my email address. That's all. Just… just leave."

"Dad, please-"

"Rory."

Rory, while giving backwards glances to Chris, left miserably. When she got back into her car, she was confused, but she just blamed it on the amount of alcohol going through his system. From the amount of bottles she had picked up and thrown away, she knew that he probably wouldn't even remember it come the following morning.

**A/N 2- Next chapter: Java. Junkie. Need I say more? Review and it'll come faster! You know you waaaaaaant to!**


	5. Why Rip The BandAid?

**Whassup:D Thanks so much for all the amazing reviews, guys! I love you all:D And for this one chapter, you get an AMAZING deal if you review! For limited time only, I will review back (if, of course, you have stories written, and I watch the shows) if you review me! So what are you waiting for? Read! Tell me what you think! Go, go, go!**

**Disclaimer- I'm a teenage girl with braids in her hair and pink heart pajamas on. Do you really think I own Gilmore Girls? Really? You do? Wow. You sure aren't smart.**

Lorelai walked around town. She was restless and needed to do something, anything, to be kept busy. Noticing Luke in his closed diner, refilling ketchup bottles, she walked over to the glass windows. "Luke! Hey, Luke! Luuuuke!" She knocked repeatedly on the glass.

"Wha- Lorelai?"

"Hey, Luke! Let me in!"

"What the-" Luke walked over and opened the door. "Lorelai? What are you doing here?"

"Chris and I… we were never married."

"You weren't? What?"

Lorelai sat down at an empty table. "I should probably explain from the beginning, shouldn't I."

"Yes, yes, you should."

"Chris and I- we got 'married' in Paris." She put finger quotes around married. "But the 'priest' that married us, he was a fake." She again put finger quotes around priest. "Just a- a random guy looking for some money, in a church.? I mean, first of all, a _church_. Dude, you could do so much better. How 'bout a soup kitchen? Or- or dress up as an injured person after a hurricane? Or just go to the pope's front yard and tell him that you're poor and need him to buy some poisoned ice cream cones and give them to little children?" Luke laughed at this.

"And so Chris found this out. And we broke up."

"Oh- Lorelai, I'm sorry-"

"No, no, don't be, it's fine, we were never meant to be. It was just a fling."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

"Well…"

"Coffee?"

"Yes, please."

Luke poured Lorelai coffee. He brought it over and she drank it thirstily.

"So my coffee's still good?"

Lorelai swallowed. "Is the world still round?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

They smiled at each other, sharing a moment. All of a sudden, Lorelai looked into his eyes and told him the words that had been on her mind. "I still love you, Luke."

Luke stared at her. He knew that he should have been shocked, but he had always known that the feelings that they had had together were always going be there. They were meant to be together. Luke brushed the hair out of her eyes and kissed her. Surprised, Lorelai broke off.

"What are you doing?"

He smiled. "Would you just stand still?"

Rory groaned as she woke up. All of the nights events came back to her in a rush and her heart sank. Her father… he didn't want to see her anymore. She was being abandoned by her own flesh and blood. _Well, it's not like it's never happened before._

That didn't mean it didn't hurt. She took a deep breath and rolled out of bed.

After she'd gotten ready for the day, she went out for some good coffee, not the disgusting crap she'd made. She wished she could go to Luke's, but it was just too far away. And just thinking of Luke… he was like a father figure… it just hurt too much to think about all of it. Finally at the coffee place, she ordered a mocha latte and sat down. Picking up her cell phone, Rory pressed speed dial five without thinking. It rang and rang, and she knew that no sane person with a hangover would let a phone go that long without picking up if they were home. But she still let it ring… not to leave a message, just to tell try and make herself believe that it was never true. Finally, she just gave up and hung up. She was almost relieved that she wouldn't have to confront him now… she wouldn't have to find out whether or not it was all real. But still, waiting for it was almost like slowly pulling off the band-aid instead of quickly ripping it. She knew that it eventually had to come off, and the longer she waited, the stickier it would get, and it would just hurt more. Only the wound under it wouldn't start healing until she let it get some air. Hopefully it wouldn't be too deep, but no matter what it would always leave a scar. Rory smiled. She was back to making horrible clichés… but it was almost like the situation disserved it. It was her father, after all. She picked up her phone and dialed the number again.

Lorelai smiled as she played with Luke's chest hairs in bed. "We should really do this more often."

Luke smiled back at her. "I know."

They laid in a comfortable silence.

"So… what's been going on in your life?"

"I'm trying to get custody, of April."

"Really? Oh, Luke, that's great!"

"It is, isn't it? But… I don't know, taking her away from Anna…"

"Well… it'd be partial custody, right?"

"Yeah, of course."

"I think you should be able to… I mean, if it was a different situation, I might have my doubts. Like, with Rory and Chris… I mean, I told Chris. He was never there. But with you… Anna never told you. You would've been there, you would've been a great dad, if you'd had the chance."

"You think?"

Lorelai smiled again. "I know."

"Thanks."

"Do you ever… do you think we could go back to the way things were?"

"Now? Lorelai… I have no idea. Things happened, we happened… we had to have been split up for a reason, right?"

She cut him off. "I was scared, and I was confused, and I know how clichéd I'm sounding right now, but Luke, I love you. And I will fight like hell to take you back."

He looked at her in the eyes. "I know you will."

**A/N- I know, this chapter's short, and late, I'm sorry! Here in the frozen (and trust me, FROZEN) New Hampshire, power has been out everywhere. So… I couldn't get on my computer and write till yesterday, because my power went out Monday, and didn't come back until Wednesday… so I was unable to access anything at all… and I was cold. So… that's my excuse. But still… review!!!**


	6. Death By Poisoned Ice Cream Cones

**A/N- So… this isn't the longest chapter. It may have been longer if I wasn't under so much pressure to get it finished! (You know who you are.) So… thanks SO SO SO SO SO much for all the reviews guys:D **

**Disclaimer- Guess what? I now own Gilmore Girls! I blackmailed the new guy that writes it! Wimpy idiot, he is. Only because I had a picture of him in drag. .:shakes head in total disbelief:.**

**Fine. I don't own it. Just stop looking at me like I'm crazy.**

Lorelai groaned and rolled over in her bed. Looking over, she panicked when she saw Luke wasn't there. He had left, she'd screwed up, she'd done everything wrong again- but then she heard the sound of breakfast. Her heart felt light with relief. He hadn't left… the love of her life hadn't left. She got up, feeling better than she had in months. After showering and dressing, she walked down to Luke.

"Breakfast, eat up."

She went over to him and kissed him. At another point in this relationship, she may have complained about something- it wasn't the same at home and not at Luke's, her coffee was decaf, there were vegetables in her eggs. But now… she just wanted to make sure she wouldn't screw this all up. She wanted everything to be perfect. Every little detail. And that included Rory knowing about everything… but not too much. She didn't want to jinx a single thing about this. So she poured herself a cup of decaf and ate her vegetables.

Rory took a deep breath as she walked into class. She had applied make-up so that no one could see her eyes, puffy from crying, and she had pulled herself together. But her father didn't want to see her any more… not ever. How could this have happened? He was drunk. He was supposed to have been drunk. Not thinking straight, not right in the mind, he loved her! But it was all just a lie.

_The phone rang and rang and rang. Finally, a slightly hung-over voice answered with a _

"'_Lo?"_

"_Hey, Dad…" Rory's voice trailed off. _

"_Rory?"_

_She would have made a sarcastic remark like, "No, your other daughter, she learned how to use the phone and imitate my voice perfectly!" if the situation wasn't so serious. Instead, all she said was, "Yeah."_

"_Rory…"_

_With this, almost all hope she had of last night being a lie drained away._

"_Last night was the truth, wasn't it."_

"_Yeah, Rory, it was."_

"_Dad, come on, please."_

"_I'm sorry Rory."_

_And with that he hung up._

She felt the tears coming again. But she blinked them away and walked into the room.

When class was over, she felt a little better. But when she started thinking about it again, that same feeling came back- her heart sinking, her stomach hurting. It had to all be a dream. But she knew it wasn't. She finally just went back to the apartment and lay in her bed. She finally gave up on all hopes of sleeping after a while. She picked up the phone and dialed Lorelai at the Dragonfly.

"Hello?" asked Michel in his strong French accent.

"Hi, Michel, I'm looking for my mom."

"Hello, Rory, I'm afraid she cannot come to the phone right now."

Rory heard her mom yell at Michel to give her the damn phone. There was some more swearing, a couple crashes, but she finally heard her mom's comforting voice on the line.

"Hi, Rory, what's up?"

"Mom."

"Rory? Sweetie is everything okay?"

"No… Mom, can I come over?"

"Yeah, of course Rory, what's wrong?"

"I'll tell you when I'm there."

"Okay, I'll go home."

Lorelai sat at home, waiting for her daughter to get there. Hearing a car pulling up, she jumped up and ran to the front door, opening it. Rory got out of her car and went directly to her mother's arms.

"Rory? Rory, what's wrong, did you and Logan break up?"

Rory sniffed. "No… Dad, he… he cut me out of his life."

Lorelai gasped. "What!?"

"He… he showed up at Yale, drunk, and I saw him talking to a security guard, or, more like the security guard telling him to leave… I brought him back to his apartment, and there were- there were bottles everywhere, Mom. And he told me that he didn't want to see me that much anymore. He said he'd email me, but he's moving to where Gigi and Sherry are… maybe their getting back together, I don't know. And I called him, today, to see if he remembered it all… and he did."

"Oh, sweetie… I'm going to kill Chris…"

Rory just cried. Lorelai hugged her while imagining all the different ways Chris could go. There were the boring things, like strangling and shooting, and then there were the poisoned ice cream cones, and slipping of sprinkles in his drink (in her mind, he had a sprinkle allergy), and… she was out. But she would have thought up of much more if she wasn't so worried about Rory. Leading her inside, Lorelai power walked over to the phone and called Satan himself. Chris's voice came through sounding tired and hung-over. "Hello?"

"Wow, he speaks… and are you aware that the hell in the hello is where you're going?"

"Lorelai-"

"Don't even _speak_, Christopher. You haven't even earned that. I cannot believe that you would _ever_ be as bad of a father to stoop _that _low. I just can't believe you."

"Lorelai, I did what was best for Ror-"

"Go to hell, Chris."

She hung up, furious out of her mind. She walked over to Rory and saw that she'd fallen asleep. She gently put a blanket over her and walked into the kitchen. Picking up the phone, she dialed Luke.

"Luke's."

"Luke. You would _never _believe what the asshole that's called a. Fucker b. Rory's father c. Chris, did. He cut her out of his life."

"What!? How's Rory?!"

"Not so good."

"Oh, my god. I'm going to kill that guy."

"I've already come up with some ideas of ways. His sprinkle allergy, we could always use that against him, poisoned ice cream cones, send him a card that says 'for everything you've done' and a bottle of drugged alcohol and set his office on fire…"

"I'll bring over a supply of fries, burgers, and everything that'll kill you."

Lorelai smiled. "Thanks Luke. For everything."

Luke smiled too. "Don't mention it."

Lorelai hung up the phone and walked over to Rory. She kissed her on the forehead and smoothed her hair back. "I'm so sorry that you had to have such an asshole father."

**A/N- You know what? I think I'll bribe people again, because I like reviews. If you review, I'll give you a cyber-hug. Who can resist hugs?**


	7. Crazy Pregnant Lady

**A/N- Hey guys, I'm so sorry I took so long to update! I was so busy the last couple of days. But the chapters here now, so please review!**

**Disclaimer- I don't own it. **

Rory looked around her room sleepily. For a second she forgot where she was, and what had happened, but then it all came back to her in a flash. Her mom and Luke had spent last night with her, watching classic movies and cursing Chris. It was amazing, to see her parents together again. _Wait… _Rory thought. _Did I just refer to Luke as my father?_ She smiled. He was her father. Maybe not by blood, or maybe not by technicalities, but he was her father. He was always there for her, in a way that only fathers could be. Chris may have been her father by blood, but that didn't count. Not at all. Luke was the one that bought her presents year after year, the one that never forgot her birthday, not even once. She would have been lucky to simply get a card from Chris. He broke her heart, he broke her mom's heart. He came back, then he left, then he came back, then he left again. She knew the cycle. Luke was a constant. Yes, her mom and him had some difficulties. They broke up, they made up. But they were meant to be with each other. In a way, Chris leaving was better for their relationship. It wasn't the best for her heart, but she could get over it. It would take more than just a night of junk food and her parents being there for her, but she would get better. Rory took a deep breath and got out of bed, smiling. After her shower, she walked into the kitchen where her mom was.

"Hey babe." Lorelai poured her a cup of coffee.

"Hey, Mom. Thanks."

"No problem. So, are you okay?"

"I'm okay, or I will be." Rory smiled almost bitterly. "We're better off without him, we survived many years before Chris. The Gilmore's are survivors! Plus we have Luke."

"We do have Luke, an added bonus."

She grinned again. The doorbell rang. Lorelai jumped up. "I'll get it."

"Okay." Rory walked over to the toaster and put some Pop Tarts in.

Lorelai answered the door. Lane stood at the other side. "Lane! What's up?"

"Hi, Lorelai… Zach and I had a fight, can I, uh, come in?"

"Sure, sure! Rory's in the kitchen, if you want to talk to her."

"Okay, thanks." Lane looked a little teary as she walked away.

"Rory, hi."

Rory swallowed. "Lane, hi! What are you doing here?"

"Zach and I had a fight, we fight about everything! God, about my eating habits, about the babies, about my mom, just everything!" Lane grabbed a Snickers out of her pocket and shoved it into her mouth, dropping the wrapper onto the ground and spraying crumbs everywhere. She began to talk again with her mouth full. "I mean, it's my body. Not his! I mean, I'm carrying his babies, but that doesn't mean that I'm some kind of delicate little creature that needs to be watched over every single second of every single day! It's all "Lane, roll over into your other side, it helps the babies. Lane, eat some tofu, the babies love that. Lane, don't you dare hold a napkin, it could have germs on it and it's far too heavy!"

Rory laughed. "Lane, I'm sure you're exaggerating just a little."

"Maybe about the napkin thing, but the rest, Rory, the rest, I'm so not kidding about the rest."

Lorelai walked in. "Isn't it kind of cute that he's worried? I mean, at least he is worried. He could just be acting completely normal and like nothing's up. And that would be wrong, and really weird, too, Zach's not really that kind of person…" She trailed off and went into deep thought.

Lane snapped her fingers in font of her face. "Focus, Lorelai, focus. He's driving me insane!!!!!! Completely insane!" She shoved yet another Snickers into her mouth.

"Jeez, where are you getting these Snickers?"

"Rory! That doesn't matter!"

"Yes it does, I can never seem to find them in Doosey's."

"I don't get them at Doosey's, I get them in that place, where you get the candy…"

"Ohh, I should have known."

Lane glared. "Sarcasm? You're being sarcastic when I'm facing a crisis here!"

"Lane." Lorelai laughed. "Take a deep breath, and calm down a little. You can stay here tonight, if you'd like. Maybe you could go take a nap?"

"Oh, sure get rid of the crazy pregnant lady!"

"Lane, you're not crazy. I'm just saying, it's very early and you're stressed. Very stressed. Very very stressed."

"Okay. Fine. I'll go lie down. But only because I can finally get some sleep without a crazy man telling me to roll over to my non-comfortable position!"

Lane waddled out and up the stairs, heading to Lorelai's room.

Lorelai called after her, "Lane, sweetie, it's uncomfort- never mind."

Rory waited until she was sure Lane was upstairs, and then mouthed to Lorelai. "She IS crazy!!"

Lorelai nodded. "I know. I know."

"How long do you think she'll stay?"

"Oh, I bet she'll go back to Zach by the time lunch comes around."

"Okay."

Rory glanced upstairs. "You wanna go to Luke's?"

Lorelai jumped up. "Yes, quickly and quietly."

She nodded. "Got it."

They finally arrived at Luke's, panting and complaining. Luke looked up when they came in.

"Why are you tired?"

Lorelai glared. "You so don't want to know." She opened her mouth to speak again.

"But you're going to tell anyway."

"What?"

"Nothing, go on."

Lorelai stared at him for a moment, and then went on. "As I was saying, we have a crazy pregnant lady at our house. Completely crazy! We had to sneak out, and we went to the car, and we realized that one, it was out of gas, but more importantly, she would be able to hear it and wake up. So we had to screw the quickly, and keep the quietly, and run here."

"Screw the what? Wait, you ran here?! In heels?"

Rory had already sat down. "In heels. You should be lucky that they don't make heels for men."

"They do."

Lorelai stared at Luke again. "You know what? I'm not even going to ask."

"Okay. What would you like to eat?"

"Coffee."

"And more coffee."

Luke just shook his head and went to get mugs. "Crazy people."

Lorelai gasped. "We're not crazy, Lane's crazy! Tell him, Rory!"

"I think you're crazy."

"I am not crazy!"

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not!"

"Yes you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Fine. I give up."

"You better."

Rory mumbled under her breath. "Crazy."

**A/N 2- So the idea about Lane was Hadar's idea. AKA stuffoholic on this site.** **So… please review!**


	8. Zacharila and Zach Junior

**A/N- I'm wicked sorry about not updating for so long. Really, I am. My school seems to find it funny to give a TON of homework… or more like a TON of hard math homework that I have no idea how to do. So I'm pretty busy. But here's and update for you guys! Please read and review, like usual!**

**Disclaimer- I don't own it, I don't have time to think of anything witty.**

Lorelai and Rory walked home from Luke's.

"I'm scared of what's to come."

"So am I, babe… god, what if Lane's gone crazier?"

"Oh, that'd be horrible. Where you that bad when you were pregnant?"

"Oh, I was worse." Lorelai laughed to herself, thinking about how much she'd driven Emily and Richard crazy.

"How?!"

"Well, there was my obsession with green apples. Grandma would get so fed up with seeing me eating them that she told the maid never to buy them again."

"Ohh, what'd you do?"

"Oh, I threatened the maid. I was violent, too, it's amazing that you came out as sane and sweet as you did."

"Yeah, it's a wonder."

"So the maid started buying them again. She just made me promise never to eat them around Grandma."

"Did you?"

"Surprisingly, no. I would have just to drive her crazy, but I really liked those green apples."

Rory laughed. "I thought I was the one that liked them? Being in your uterus and all."

"Whatever, genius. I used to skip health class."

"Oh… well did Grandma ever find out about your eating of them?"

"Yes! She can smell things from miles away! It comes with being rich and stuck up. It sucked, because then I had to spray my room with this really bad smelling perfume to get the smell of apple out."

"So you didn't just stop eating them?"

"Honey, I could have stopped eating them in a heartbeat. It was your problem!"

"Oh, sure… then why don't I like them now?"

"Because! You obviously had far too much in my uterus and got out and thought 'what was she feeding me in there?!'"

"Because babies think so well!"

"You did, you were smart."

"Oh, I'm sure."

They walked up their front lawn to the porch. "Mom… it's coming closer…"

"It'll be fine, it'll be fine… just fine…"

Lorelai carefully opened up the door and tiptoed inside, Rory close behind her. They shut the door and waited tentatively for something to happen. When there was no noise coming from the inside, they both breathed huge sighs of relief.

"Lorelai! Rory!"

They both screamed at the top of their lungs. Lorelai grabbed a pillow from the couch and went to go protect herself.

"Lane! Omigod!"

Rory gasped and jumped back. "Jesus!"

Lane glared. "What, am I now so scary that you can't stand the sight of me?"

"No, Lane, we just didn't expect you."

"Why not? I asked if I could stay!"

"But we figured that it you'd make up with Zach by now." Rory realized that she could somehow, piss Lane off with that. "Because, you know, you two have such an amazing relationship."

"Yeah, really amazing." Lorelai put her input in while still holding the pillow for protection.

Lane took a deep breath. "I was just wondering if you two could take me to the hospital, for my ultrasound."

"But… don't you think Zach would want to be there?"

"If you want, you can pick him up on the way. But only if you make him promise not to be crazy!!!"

"We will, we'll threaten him if we need to."

"Okay."

They walked outside and got into the car, Lane in the back. "Wait, why do I have to sit in the back? Is it because I'm pregnant and I'm so fat that there's no room for me? Or is it because you're going to put my husband next to me and try and make up kiss and make up?"

Lorelai got that Lane is crazy look on her face, but Rory came up with a sufficient answer.

"No, Lane, it's because our butts are molded into these seats. We didn't think you'd be too comfortable in our ass-seats."

"Oh, alright." Lane shrugged.

They pulled into the driveway of Lane's apartment. Rory and Lorelai got out and locked Lane in the car. She didn't notice, she was sound asleep. They walked up to the door and knocked. Zach came over with a sleepy look on his face, but it quickly turned to worried.

"Oh my God, is Lane with you? Where is she? Is she eating right?! If she took a nap, did she sleep on the better side for the baby?!!!"

"Now I see what Lane means." Rory whispered to Lorelai.

Lorelai laughed and looked at Zach. "Lane wants you to promise to not bug her at all about any of those things and come to the ultrasound."

Zach gasped. "There's an ultrasound? Today!?"

"Do you promise?"

"Yes, fine, whatever."

"Okay. Let's go."

They got into the car, Zach in the backseat next to Lane. He put his hand on her stomach and kissed her on the forehead.

"Aww." Rory said to Lorelai.

"They are a cute couple, aren't they?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Let's go."

"Okay."

They pulled up to the hospital. Lane woke up and got out of the car, Zach supporting her.

She looked at Rory and Lorelai. "Did he promise?"

"He promised."

"Good."

She walked inside and to the front desk, the rest of them following close behind.

"I'm here for my ultrasound?"

A doctor walked in. "Lane, hello. Would you like to come right in?"

"Yes."

"Alright, will your husband coming as well?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

"Zach, come on!"

"Coming, Lane!"

They disappeared behind the doors.

After about an hour, Lane and Zach walked into the waiting area.

Zach walked excitedly toward Rory and Lorelai. "Guess what."

"What?"

"It's a boy! And a girl! Zach Junior and Zacharila!"

"No." Lane came over as well. "We are going to get home and discuss the REAL options."

"Aww, Lane!"

"Do you want my daughter's nickname at school to be Ape-face?"

"No, but…"

"I refuse to name either of them after you."

"What!?"

"I won't."

"Fine."

"How about the name… Laila? Do you like that?"

"No way. Too… Hawaiian. How about Jessica?"

"Naming her after a slut? No freaking way, my friend."

Zach put his arm around Lane and they walked out the door.

Rory and Lorelai smiled after them.

"They really really are a cute couple, Mom."

"I know babe, they really are."

**A/N 2- Damnit, I really took a loooong time to update, didn't I? Well, I swear I'll update sooner in the future. But I got less reviews for the last chapter, does that mean people are losing interest? I hope not. :( Please review! It really makes my day! And, of course, thank you so much for people who already reviewed. I'll bribe you guys again, even though I know I've got some loyal fans who'll review anyway. If you review, I swear I'll reply. As long as you've got an account here. So please review! **


	9. The Fight of Crazy

**A/N- Oh, my. Has it really been over a month? I'm sorry! There was just this HUGE writer's block going for me, every time I'd go to write something… nothing would come to my mind. I couldn't write at ALL. But I sat down today and I wrote all of this! I'm so excited! I hope you guys like this new chapter! I've added in a bit of drama, per request/suggestion. Yay for drama.**

**Disclaimer- Still a huge writer's block going for me, I'm not thinking of anything clever/witty/original to say here, other than I simply don't own it. The story would be going in a much different direction if I did. And there'd be no hiatuses. Ever. Hey, maybe my writer's block is going away! Okay, anyway. Story:**

Luke Danes wiped down a table in the closing hours of the night. He was doing his routine, wiping and thinking. For the longest time, the only thing on his mind was Lorelai. It had been ever since she first walked into his diner and left him speechless, just staring at the door. They had been through so much together, for so long. They had history. They had meaning. Sure, there were ups and downs, but that was all a part of any relationship. But she went off and married Chris. Even though it ended up they weren't married, she had still gone into it with a full intention of marrying him. Maybe it was because he had broken her heart, or that he stopped being the same person. But he had never stopped loving her, even for a second. He had tried to, as hard as possible. But he couldn't. He flipped the sign to closed and walked upstairs to his apartment, debating on whether or not he should call Lorelai to tell him what he had done while she had run off with Chris.

Lorelai and Rory were back home again, after having dropped Lane off with Zach. They were relieved to find the house empty again. There was no more crazy pregnant Lane, thank God. But the house was still semi-crazified, with Snickers' wrappers everywhere. Lorelai's bed was unmade, and the chairs were still pushed out from breakfast that morning.

"Mom, seriously, were you that crazy when you were pregnant?"

"Sweetie, we've been over this before: I am not crazy. I have never been crazy. I will never be crazy."

"You never know, what if I drive you crazy?"

"You could never drive me crazy, you're too sane to be crazy."

"Even when you were pregnant with me? The morning sickness, the hormones, everything?"

"I'm serious! You're way too sane! Are there mental hospitals for the overly-sane? I mean, everyone's got a little bit of crazy in them."

"Ha! So you admit that you've got crazy in you!"

"No, you see, I'm the perfect balance between sane and insane. I've got no sane, and I've got no crazy."

"Mom, that doesn't make any sense. You're nothing?"

"No, I'm perfect."

Rory just shook her head and muttered under her breath, "Oh my god, she's the craziest person I've ever met."

Unfortunately, Lorelai heard this. "What? Are you actually accusing me of being crazy? Not just crazy, but the craziest? Have you met Taylor? Babette? Kirk? Those are the crazies in this town!"

"Fine! Fine, you win, you are so crazy there's no winning for me!"

"Wait, I think that overrides the 'I win!' Because if you call me crazy, but you say I win, then that doesn't work. By saying I win, then you're telling me that I'm not crazy. But then you're calling me crazy. You know what, kid, I think you're crazy!"

Rory gasped. "What? No! You said I wasn't crazy!"

"Well, I changed my mind."

"Not fair!"

"Neither are you."

"Fine, we are both crazy! That means we both win! Can this be done?"

"No! Because we both win, but we lose too! So it's not right!"

"I give up!"

Rory walked into the kitchen from the living room and started making some coffee. Lorelai quickly followed, opening her mouth as if to say something more on the crazy topic. But she quickly changed her mind, as the entire fight had confused her senseless. "Rory, sweets, I'm going to Luke's.

"Okay, bye!"

"Bye."

She walked outside into her car and put her keys into the ignition. She tried to start the car, but no luck. It just growled and died, over and over again. Finally she just gave up and got out again, deciding to call the mechanic in the morning. _Wait, couldn't I just ask Luke when I go over? _She shook her head and began to walk in the direction of the diner.

Rory gave up finally on making coffee. She wouldn't be able to sleep that night if she made it now, and she needed the sleep. She needed to be able to just fall asleep right away, and not think about anything. Not Logan and his new business, or her father, or her mom and Luke together. She had already broken down for that. She didn't think she would be able to handle another breakdown. She just needed a cup of tea and a good book that night. She filled the teapot up with water and put it on the stove to boil. Figuring it would take at least a couple minutes to be ready; she went into her room and got out a pair of pajamas and a book. She pulled on the clothes and quickly ran a brush through her hair. Hearing a whistle from the kitchen, she ran over to the pot and turned the stove off. She grabbed a mug and a teabag from the cabinet, and made her tea. She brought it back into her room and curled up on the bed, sipping tea and reading the well worn copy of a book.

Luke was in his apartment, just finishing up his dinner, when he heard a knock from downstairs. He put his dishes quickly in the sink and went down the stairs, expecting to see some town crazy wanting food. He was surprised to see Lorelai there, and he started to get nervous. He knew that once he started talking to her, he'd have to tell her what had happened in the time they had broken up. If he hid it from her, she'd be more than mad when she found out on her own. And it's not like she was innocent, either, he hadn't done anything that was more wrong than what she did. He took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hey, Lorelai."

"Hey Luke, what's up?"

"Nothing, how about you?"

He mentally cursed himself.

"Oh… my car died."

"Died?"

"Well, that's not why I came, I went to go here, and it made this sort of growling noise, so I was wondering if you could go and look at it in the morning?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Okay, great. But I came over here just… to see you, I guess."

"Yeah, I've been meaning to talk to you."

"About what?"

"Well… about what happened while we were split up."

"What do you mean?"

Lorelai took a chair down from one of the tables and sat down. Luke just stood around kind of awkwardly.

"Well… Anna and I, we kind of hooked up."

"What?!"

"Yeah, umm… well, we were talking, about the custody thing. And that the whole thing was kind of stupid, I mean, I'm her father, and she kept that information from me. So we started to agree on things, and she apologized. And granted me as much custody as I wanted. I mean, as much as I asked for in the first place. And one thing led to another, and… it just happened."

"Does that mean… you lied to me?"

"What do you mean?"

"You didn't even tell me, that you got custody of her. When I talked to you, and told you that I still loved you, you told me you were trying to get custody. Trying, Luke. That you hadn't yet."

"I'm sorry; I just… didn't want to have to explain things."

"So you didn't. You lied to me."

"Look, Lorelai, it's not like you're so innocent in the sleeping with the parent with your child and lying about it!"

Lorelai looked at Luke.

"I can't believe you would say that to me. I can't believe that you would ever use that against me."

"Lorelai, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"No, Luke! I never lied to you about that, not once."

"I can't believe you're getting mad at me for this, Lorelai! I made a mistake, okay? I'm sorry."

"I'm not mad that you slept with Anna, okay? I, of all people, am not the one that should be mad for that! I'm mad because you lied to me, Luke."

"I told you now, didn't I?"

"I need to get out of here. I can't deal with this right now."

She got up and headed for the door.

"Lorelai, wait. You're just going to run away?"

"Well, that's what I do, best, isn't it?"

"Okay, fine, go off and calm down."

"Yeah. That's exactly what I'll do!"

Lorelai walked out of the diner.

**A/N 2- Didja like it? I'm hoping so, even though I haven't really seen any Gilmore Girls lately. I went and watched five minutes before I wrote this chapter, though, to get in the mood. Not of the current season, though, God no. Fourth season. Okay, anyway, I love reviews! .:wink wink:. **


	10. Just To Fix It All

**A/N- …sorry it took me so long? –face palm- I won't bore you with my excuses, but… review? So sorry.**

**Disclaimer- Gilmore Girls and all related property belong to either the CW or the WB or just whatever happens to a show when it dies. –is a bit bitter-**

Luke walked awkwardly to Lorelai's house. He had his hands in his pocket, and the baseball cap Lorelai had given him on his head. He turned into her driveway and started towards the Jeep. However, he stopped when he saw that Lorelai's shades were open. He walked over to the kitchen window and saw her sitting there, at four in the morning, drinking coffee. She glanced in his direction and did a double take as she noticed him standing there. She took a deep breath and walked over to the window and opened it.

"Luke? What the hell are you doing here at four in the morning?"

"I, uh, came to fix your car."

"At four in the morning?"

"It's before the diner opens."

"At four in the morning."

"Okay, look, can you stop saying four in the morning?"

"Maybe."

"Lorelai, I'm really sorry about lying to you."

Lorelai sighed.

"Why don't you come in?"

When Luke was situated and with tea (he remained opposed to coffee) they began to have the discussion again.

"Luke, look. I know, I _know_ that I'm a hypocrite. That's one of my problems. I do things to people that I wouldn't be able to handle if they did them to me. Take Rory and my parents, for example. I had her, I raised her, I left them. But if Rory did the same to me, I don't think I would ever be able to forgive her, to forgive myself. It's not just about the lying. I know that, you know that. I, at least, hope you know that."

Luke nodded.

"I know that."

"But see, the thing is, I need to be able to deal with it. I need to forgive you, and I need to move on. I know I do."

"But can you?"

"I can try."

Luke looked at her for a long while.

"Okay."

"Okay."

Lorelai stood up abruptly.

"My car, that's what you came for! You need to fix my car, before I have to go to work, before you have to go to work."

"It's alright, Caesar will open."

"Well, okay then, but I should get in to work early."

"I thought you liked to torture Michel?"

"I do, but Sookie's going crazy today because there's these big fancy clients coming in, and she has to cook, and oh dear god, did I just say clients?"

Luke laughed.

"You did."

"I'm beginning to feel like a businessman, you have no idea."

"A man?"

"Businesswoman, whatever."

"I just wasn't aware of your sex-change."

Lorelai hit him with a dish towel.

"Ow!"

"You big wimp, I hit you with a towel!"

"Well, it still hurt!"

"Right."

"So I should probably start fixing that car."

"You probably should."

"Uh… would you happen to have my tools?"

"Huh?"

"My tools, I left them here."

"Oh, well, uh…"

"Please say you didn't loose my tools!"

Luke began to look worried.

"I didn't! I just… seem to have misplaced them."

"Lorelai, I can't fix your car without my tools!"

"I'll find them!"

She got up and began her search. She searched high and low for those tools, but she couldn't find them. Luke was pissed, to say the least. And Lorelai was extremely worried.

"I had them here! I swear I did!"

"Yeah, but you lost them."

"Well, they weren't my responsibility!"

"I left them here."

"Exactly! _You_ left them here. I didn't."

"Well, of course you didn't. It's your house."

"Exactly! My house! Not your storage space!"

"Well, it's not my fault you have some kind of attachment to those tools."

"Hey! It is too, _you're_ the one who left them here!"

"Not for you to get attached to, because you make me fix things here all the time."

"So?"

"Well, it's your fault."

"No, it's your fault."

"Your fault."

"Your faul- wait, why am I arguing with you?"

"You started it."

"Lorelai, are you five?"

"No, I'm six."

"Very mature."

"Thank you. I do try."

"Well you obviously try very hard, as you don't have my tools!"

"Not my fault!"

"Right."

"Right indeed."

"Lorelai, I was being sarcastic."

"I know!"

"No, you didn't."

"Did so!"

"You're acting like a five year old."

"Is it just me, or do you keep on accusing me of being five?"

"It's just you."

Lorelai gasped.

"No! It's not!"

"Fine, it's not."

"Ha! I knew it! If I was five, then how was I supposed to know to keep your tools?"

"Lorelai, can't we just focus on finding the tools?"

"Fine."

Luke began to walk up the stairs, but stopped for a moment.

"Lorelai, I know where they are."

"Where?"

Luke shook his head and walked into the bathroom. He opened up the bottom drawer of the plastic make-up case in the closet and triumphantly pulled out the tools. Lorelai, who was right behind him, gasped in awe.

"I knew that's where I put them!"

"Where you put them?"

"Yeah…"

"No. Where I left them because I knew you would never find them here because you never look in this closet."

"Fine. Where you put them."

"Thank you."

Luke walked outside and began to work on the Jeep, with Lorelai watching.

"Wow, you're sexy when you work."

"Lorelai…"

"Oh, come on Luke! We've been separated; I miss your sexy body."

"Lorelai!"

"What?"

"Please, I'm trying to work."

"But… but…"

"No buts."

Lorelai giggled.

"Diiirty."

Luke just groaned.

Lorelai smirked.

"Lukey, I think you like it."

"Lorelai…"

"Ohh, you do, you like it, you like me admiring your sexy body!"

"LORELAI!"

Lorelai stepped back a bit.

"Scarily sexy."

Luke just ignored her and worked on.

"Strong and silent, I like that…"

"Lorelai, what would it take for me to shut you up?"

"Oh, I don't know, plane tickets to Puerto Rico, tickets for a Paul Anka concert, _with _the dog Paul Anka accompanying me, perhaps a-"

Luke got up, walked over, and kissed her heavily on the lips. When they finally broke away, Lorelai touched her lips, smiling.

"That works too."

**A/N 2- Once again, guys, I'm really sorry. I hope I haven't lost my audience, besides, -ahem- SPOILERS FOR THOSE WHO HAVEN'T SEEN THE FINALE, Luke and Lorelai got back together in the show. And… I'm not sure if all stories qualify as AU if they follow a specific storyline after a while and stray away from the show, but this story is basically AU now. So I'm not quite sure if it really matters if Luke and Lorelai got back together in the show, since I'm just writing blindly about it now. I plan on finishing this story, and there will still be some hints and references to the show, like for example Rory and Logan breaking up, but other than that, I'm just writing freely now. That all contained spoilers, didn't it? Well then: SPOLER END. I do hope I haven't lost my audience, so I'd love it if some of you guys could drop by and leave me a review. Thanks for reading. **


End file.
